Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Two Weeks

I am in such a countdown mode, I can't help it. I can't help but wanting pregnancy to be over. I hate it. HOW I HATE IT.

Litany:

  • I have heartburn all the time.
  • I have the wickedest cold with the wickedest cough I've ever had.
  • I can take exactly NOTHING for it.
  • I went to the med check today just to be sure I didn't have pneumonia (I don't). She said I had a 'bad' URI, except not an infection, just a virus. I know it's better to not need antibiotics, but just like with my kids, I wish it were something fixable, just the same.
  • I couldn't see the doctor last week. They are making us see everyone in the practice and every time I've seen a different doctor, I've had to wait in excess of like 30 minutes. It burns my ASS to wait longer than the appointment is going to take. So last time I left and I canceled my appointment this week, because it was with another doctor.
  • But then I had high blood pressure - not super high, 142 over ... 78 or something but not great, certainly higher than it's been. So I called to make an appointment to see my doctor and FIRST the girl said that she'd 'try to figure out who I could see' and THEN, when I said I wanted to see MY doctor, she said, all snooty, that I was supposed to see my doctor anyway, here at 38 weeks. Whatever. Now I'm going on Friday. So I just ... hope the blood pressure isn't indicative of pre eclampsia or something? Mmmmkay.
  • I am so tired.
  • My back hurts.
  • I can't sleep.
  • My husband keeps telling me how it's SO CLOSE and it's not.
  • I am a wussy. I can't take chronic pain.
  • I know that if I weren't pregnant and I had such a cold, I'd just glug Nyquil straight from the bottle and sleep and sleep.
  • I can't wait to go to the hospital and meet this baby AND not be pregnant anymore.
  • I'm scared nursing is going to hurt since it's been so long since I've done it.
  • I'm scared the baby isn't going to be okay.
  • I'm scared it's going to be a boy and a) have to be circumcised and b) have autism.
  • I'm scared I can't do it. Four kids. FOUR KIDS. ONE OF THEM IS KATHLEEN! She crazy!
  • My parents are leaving town to be snowbirds when this baby is five days old.
On the plus side:

  • I can do this, I've done it before.
  • If I had pre eclampsia, it would probably present with other symptoms, right?
  • Who cares if this baby has autism? We should probably cross that bridge when we come to it. Ditto: circumcision.
  • I know this cold will go away the second the baby is born.
  • Less than two weeks is less than two weeks, it is kind of soon.
  • My parents drive me crazy anyway, who cares if they're not here.
  • New baby! New person!

2 comments:

Doing My Best said...

You can do it!! A new, fuzzy baby head to snuzzle and sniff! Tiny baby toes!

If it makes you feel any better, my friend has 3 boys and 2 girls, and only her 2nd boy has autism. I have 4 boys, 1 girl and only my 1st has Asperger's. (There's a comforting sample size for you ;-).)

Sarah said...

End of pregnancy is probably my least favorite time in LIFE, generally speaking, and I've never even gone further than thirty eight weeks and some days. AND I'm relatively tall and "built for baby having" apparently. And I still find it miserable, so. You're not a wuss. No one in the whole dang world is feeling fantastic and perky at nine months pregnant.

I think it's kind of crappy of your parents to leave so soon. But if they really do annoy you, then yes, it's probably for the best. But still not the nicest gesture on their part! Or, maybe it's a compliment? You seem so together that they assume you'll take this new addition in stride and wouldn't really need any help anyways? I guess that's possible too.